Thursday, April 14, 2011

Grossest Parenting Moment Yet.

This was originally posted in 2009:

Last week, I had THE SICKEST moment of my parenting career. I'll try to paint the disgusting picture for you...
For some reason, our dog, Bindi was inside for the afternoon. I have no idea why. Bindi is an outside dog and only comes in once in a blue moon or if we hear nearby gunshots (that happened last night and we called 911) or during a big, blustery storm. None of these scenarios were taking place. Noelle was in school and Jude was home with me. It was late morning, I guess around 11AM. I had noticed earlier that Bindi had gone into the bathroom and drank nearly all of the water from the toilet. I'll confess, we haven't trained her not to because she is usually outside. I wasn't terribly worried about her drinking the toilet water because I had recently cleaned the toilet. I did notice that Bindi was really thirsty. That was probably around 10AM. Now, around 11AM I heard Bindi and Jude playing in the living room. Jude was giggling and chatting it up with Bindi and goofing around on the floor with her. I had to use the bathroom and when I walked in I noticed a piece of used toilet paper on the bathroom floor. This isn't a usual thing in the Brem household, but I wasn't alarmed and thought that Jude had possibly dropped it after wiping his cute little buns. One thing you must know about Jude; The kid poops about 5 times a day. I'm not joking. And often, he doesn't flush. Well, here we are in the bathroom noticing the used toilet paper on the floor and I pick it up and go to toss it in the toilet when I notice that Jude had once again committed a "poop and run". Except this time I notice that the water in the toilet is looking VERY low and the poop looks like it has been destroyed by some strange phenomenon. At that moment, I remember that Bindi had been repeatedly licking Jude's face while they were playing. I ran out of the bathroom (I flushed before I left) and find a VERY stinky 5 year old happily playing with his dog. Now, he didn't slightly reek of poop. I nearly gagged when I smelled his face and the only thing I could think was, "My son's face is covered in his own poop." Needless to say, Jude got a late morning scrub-down in the bath.


  1. Very funny. Oh, that's one for the books.

  2. Oh, Patty, I literally had the dry heaves when I read this.

  3. OH MAN. I love this and hate it at the same time. Nice one.

  4. you never cease to crack me up till I am falling out of my chair! -Casey