Tuesday, March 8, 2011

The Cow In The Garage...

I have a large, complicated and lovely family. It seems as though there are millions of us, because most of the people that I grew up around were my "cousins" even though they may not have been blood related. I like that about my family. I do not like that when I was supposed to make a family tree for Anthropology class in college, I stayed up until 2 AM trying to figure everything out, ended-up crying and finally had to lie on the tree to make it all make sense. I know most people say they have "crazy" in their family, but I promise, I really do. My close friends love to have me tell stories about my family because so many stories are hilarious and so many are truly unbelievable. Thank you family, for making me so entertaining!

About a year ago, Gavin and I were laying in bed watching TV and some random commercial came on (that I don't remember - oops!) and it sparked a memory of mine about milking a cow. Noelle had learned to milk a cow in Washington on a school field trip and I mentioned something about having milked a cow myself quite a few times growing up. Now, Gavin grew-up with his family (Grandma & Grandpa) OWNING A CATTLE RANCH and when I asked him if he had ever milked a cow (AT AGE 33!) and he said, "No"...well, I was shocked. His family's ranch is for beef cattle, and guess what? They don't milk beef cattle. They just raise em' and sell em' and then people eat em'. Still, it was a very bizarre fact to learn about my husband since 90% of the people in his family I would consider to be "real cowboys/cowgirls" (Gavin is part of the other 10%) and real cowboys and cowgirls are supposed to milk cows in my mind.

As Gavin justified himself and his reasons for never milking a cow he nonchalantly asked me where in the world I had learned to do such a thing having never lived on a farm or owning any livestock in my lifetime. I promise you, it had NEVER crossed my mind until it that moment when it came spewing out of my mouth and I saw the dumbfounded look on my husband's face, that there was anything strange about MY GRANDMA KEEPING A COW IN HER GARAGE. Never. Totally normal.

My Grandma was an extremely resourceful woman. Thanks for teaching me how to milk a cow. In your garage.


  1. Hahahaha!!! Oh Patty. I love you. I love your family. I love God. I love God for making your family and putting you in it and giving you a sense of humor. And a funny husband who helps you see how funny things really are. And, I'm so thankful for that cow. And that it lived in the garage. So many questions, that raises . . . wow. I love it. You made my night. :) And oh yes, I am one of those friends that LOVES Patty family stories!!! :) ~ AMP

  2. Oh how I wish there was a picture that could accompany this post! Pure awesomeness.

  3. Laughing so hard! You are as genius as Nikki Gray at building up to and delivering the punch line in story.

  4. Just today I was thinking we need a cow because my kids go through milk like crazy people. Now if we just had a garage...